i only say the E word when i need a really good laugh.

today alvin and i were driving around running errands, and for about the fifth time we got stuck in a parking lot full of many, many slow people who couldn't figure out that the secret to making their cars move was to press the gas pedal. alvin normally has way more patience than i do but today it was too much even for him. he then proceeded to mock the slow people's inability to just fucking move already in a high-pitched nasally voice that made me laugh. this means that alvin was being extra fun and, naturally, was about to pay for it.

once we got out of parking lot traffic and into street traffic he cranked up the radio in what was meant to be a show of defiance but was more like payback from the karma gods. i was surprised he turned up the volume at all since green day was on and they're so overplayed lately that he refuses to listen to any of their music. unfortunately for him the song was brain stew, and the next lyrics to come blaring out of the speakers were: my eyes feel like they're gonna bleed.

most people who know alvin know that he has a serious problem with any mention of the word eye, and even any reference made to eyes will immediately cause his to turn red and water profusely. it took me a second to realize what was about to happen and when i looked over at him tears were streaming down his face. at least he saw the humor in the situation, so when i laughed so hard that i cried he sort of understood. sort of. of course, my watering eyes just made his cry more.

this was the second time this week that his totally unsympathetic sympathetic eye response has caught him off guard. on thursday night we went to a social gathering with a bunch of people i go to school with, and after a few margaritas the conversation turned to how to make liquid shoot out your nose, followed by someone confessing that they blow air out their eyes when they laugh too hard. i was really amused by that, but alvin's eyes? not so much.